Hot Mess Alert: What The Fuck Is Going On?

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I am just in shock. I feel like I have been around the world in the last few weeks. The learning has been accelerated and the Karma has been fast and furious.

I have a sense of discombobulation and an appearance of wonky-ness that is sort of hard to shake.

I’ve let most things fall by the way side- especially my writing. But to be quite honest – I don’t give a f*ck! I am totally ok with being where I am.

I have been through a lot over the past few weeks and I have gotten through it all with grace and elegance. I have learned an infinite amount and have led with a mature moral compass.

I am damn proud of this me that is going through life without giving up.

I am very surprised that I have carried myself with compassion and have been immensely kind and patient with the multiple transitions that have been hurled my way.

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It’s to the point where I don’t even recognize this me. Who is this human?

Here I am, sitting in my new 2 bedroom 2 bathroom apartment in West Hollywood. The apartment complex has a pool, sauna, bbq area and gym.

I have my own parking spot to park all my hopes and dreams that will be soon coming into reality.

West Hollywood was God’s plan.

My plan was to move to Manhattan Beach where things were comfortable and where my roommate had already forged the trail for me- having lived there for nearly a year.

That arrangement quickly fell through and so we decided to look for a place together closer to where the pulse of Los Angeles was beating.

We had looked at a nice apartment building but the requirements left us frazzled and worried about the mountain of paperwork we had to provide. We both weren’t happy with the apartment.

That’s when we looked at each other and simultaneously agreed that it should not be this hard. We released our expectations and that same day were looking at a new place that had all the amenities and a lower price tag than the original apartment.

Our deposit was $99. Plus $1000 dollars off the first month of rent.

When God delivers- GOD DELIVERS.

Anyway, they are building two dog parks out back and it is expected to be ready in two months. One of those doggy parks will be for small dogs aka Martini heaven.

But it’s not about the things.

“Miracles are natural. When they do not occur something has gone wrong.”

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Moving.

The distance I have travelled in the physical world is nothing compared to the internal transformation and journey that has occurred within.

I have always been accused of being grounding for others around me. I have been told that I help others remain calm. That’s a funny thing to be told when you once suffered from anxiety and were a hot mess within.

I now always joke that I am human Xanax. Though I have never personally reaped the benefits of being high on my own supply.

During the course of the past few weeks- with all the ups and downs- I have seen the miracle of remaining in a constant state of peace, trust and faith.

Never before have I been grounding and calm for myself. A complete Miracle.

In the midst of it all- I got offered a chance to  guest host a radio show.

Almost two years to the day from when I walked away from Corporate America- I will be on Raising Vibrations Radio hosted by Reverend Raven and I cannot wait!

Tune in Monday, May 16th at 8:30 pm ET/ 5:30 pm PT.

Oh, did I mention that 5 planets are in retrograde? Crazy energy much?

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